“By All Outward Appearances, Heath Ledger Was Not Depressed — He Was Smiling Ear-to-Ear on the Set of His Last Film”

Commentary by Psychiatrist Dr. Noah Swayne:

Startling new evidence shows that late actor Heath Ledger, who died last January after overdosing on pills commonly prescribed for depression, anxiety and insomnia, was very happy on the set of his last film, The Dark Night, and thus was not depressed when he died. Specifically, Carbolic Smoke Ball has obtained stunning photographs that show Ledger smiling ear to ear, including this one.

Some might question whether Ledger’s personal hygiene was all that it should have been — the photos suggest he hadn’t washed his green hair in quite some time and that his lipstick was not applied with care. But from a MENTAL HEALTH PERSPECTIVE, the smile shows he was one happy son-of-a-bitch.

Allow me to illustrate. Do you know who Nat King Cole was? He’s dead now. He was a BLACK singer. Mr. King Cole was the first singer I ever got laid to, but that’s the subject of another commentary. It turns out nobody knew more about PSYCHIATRY than Mr. Nat King Cole, and especially when he sang these immortal words: “Pretend you’re happy when you’re blue. It isn’t very hard to do. And you’ll find happiness without an end. Whenever you pretend.”

The point of those seemingly POINTLESS WORDS is that even when you’re “blue” (from a mental health perspective, that means “depressed”), you will become happy just by pretending you are happy. That, even I admit, seems idiotic, for want of a more scientific term, but I didn’t write the song. And what does this have to do with Mr. Ledger?

The lesson from all this, according to Mr. King Cole, is that even if Mr. Ledger was depressed, he would have “chased those blues away” (to paraphrase Caucasian singer Frank Sinatra) when he put that big red grin on his face — that is, merely by PRETENDING he was happy.

My diagnosis: Mr. Ledger was not depressed when he took the pills. I suspect foul play, most likely perpetrated by a jilted MALE lover who thought Mr. Ledger was really ranch hand Ennis Del Mar, the character Mr. Ledger played in a movie. (“Ennis” is a name that takes its Latin root from the word “penis,” so I suspect Ennis was gay.) This is all from a MENTAL HEALTH PERSPECTIVE.  Don’t thank me for this revelation; thank Mr. Nat King Cole, who is dead.

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Posted in Entertainment, Health, Life
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