Blog Archives

Quality of 2010’s Celebrity Deaths ‘Very Disappointing’

Earlier this week, former I Spy star Robert Culp joined a cavalcade of Hollywood has beens, including Peter Graves, Fess Parker, and Corey Haim, who have passed away in 2010.  Entertainment experts say the rash of deaths of “celebrities” whose fame peaked decades ago is

Posted in Entertainment, Obituaries

Haig: ‘As of now, I am in control here in the cemetery’

Posted in Obituaries

Reclusive J.D. Salinger a No-Show At Morgue

Posted in Obituaries

Taco Bell Mascot Euthanized After Mauling Fast Food Chain’s Founder to Death

IRVINE, California – Gidget “Taco Bell chihuahua” Chipperton, the iconic mascot of Mexican-style fast food behemoth Taco Bell, was euthanized this morning after mauling to death the chain’s beloved founder, Glen Bell. “Gidget heard somebody yell ‘¡Yo quiero Taco Bell!’ and she just

Posted in Obituaries

Physician Who Treated JFK Dies After Two Year Battle With Lung Cancer, and Because He Knew Too Much

DALLAS – Dr. Malcolm Perry, 80, who struggled unsuccessfully to save President John F. Kennedy after he was shot in Dallas on November 22, 1963, has become the latest witness to the assassination to die under mysterious circumstances. Physicians say Perry

Posted in Obituaries

Obituary: Walter Cronkite: Mastered Art of Delivering News Phonetically

NEW YORK – Walter Cronkite, who had no idea what he was saying when he read the news to millions of Americans every night and yet was regarded as truth’s most trusted custodian, is dead at 92. Cronkite fled the Netherlands and came to New York during World

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Posted in Media, Obituaries

Michael Jackson Shocker: Joe Jackson Left Out of Son’s Will, Heads Back to Cornfield

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Posted in Obituaries

Michael Jackson Warned His Son That Whoever Approaches Him To Set Up a Meeting Will Be The Traitor

“Prince, Barzini wants to arrange a meeting.  He says we can straighten out any of our problems.  I can arrange security on my territory.”

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Posted in Entertainment, Obituaries

Shocker: After Finding Michael Jackson Lifeless, His Masseuse Called Mary-Kate Olsen

Family converges on Jackson home, Jackson’s son asks “Why are all these black people here?”  Warren Commission reconvened to investigate cause of death. HOLLYWOOD – The Warren Commission was reconvened for the first time since it investigated the death of President John

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Posted in Obituaries

Gruesome Discovery: Removal of Michael Jackson’s Nose Reveals Terrified Blond Boy Trapped Inside Him

HOLLYWOOD – Emergency room physicians at UCLA Medical Center, working feverishly to resuscitate entertainment sensation Michael Jackson Thursday afternoon after he stopped breathing, accidentally snapped off The King of Pop’s nose and were shocked to find a terrified blond, Caucasian male, approximately 7 or 8 years old,

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Posted in Entertainment, Obituaries

“Kung Fu” Icon David Carradine Died of Self-Inflicted Kick Wounds

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Posted in Obituaries

Five Years After Ronald Reagan’s Death, We Reprint Some of the Moving Tributes Paid to Him That day

“I was impressed with him from our first meeting — he was so intimidating he made my head break out in a rash.” — Mikhail Gorbachev “Some have misconstrued our relationship as having been marked by animosity. It is difficult to

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Posted in History, Obituaries

National Enquirer Publishes 40th Edition Announcing “The End” for Patrick Swayze

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Posted in Obituaries

Co-Creator of Mr. Magoo is Dead at 92

Millard Kaufman’s car flipped over an embankment after he encountered a series of improbable sticky situations brought on by his latent myopia, which he stubbornly refused to acknowledge.

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Posted in Obituaries

Mr. Peanut Hangs Self After Testing Positive for Salmonella

ATLANTIC CITY – Emerson Wickwire Peanut, III, known the world over as Mr. Peanut, the iconic mascot of food giant Planters, is dead at 92 of an apparent suicide.  Just hours before the shell of the always-dapper Mr. Peanut was found hanging from Atlantic City’s

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Posted in Obituaries

Death of John Updike Casts Black Cloud Over Super Bowl Media Day

TAMPA – The death of noted author John Updike cast a pall over Super Bowl Media day sessions, as players and coaches alike struggled to deal with the loss while at the same time preparing for Sunday’s world championship football

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Posted in Obituaries, Sports

By All Outward Appearances, Heath Ledger Was Not Depressed — He Was Smiling Ear-to-Ear on the Set of His Last Film

Commentary by Dr. Noah Swayne, Psychiatrist Startling new evidence shows that late actor Heath Ledger, who died after overdosing on pills commonly prescribed for depression, anxiety and insomnia, was very happy on the set of his last film, The Dark

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Posted in Obituaries

FCC Bans Seven Words From George Carlin’s Tombstone

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Posted in Obituaries

“Peanuts” Animator Bill Melendez Dies at 91

Mourners have difficulty understanding sermon at funeral because minister’s voice sounded like a muted trombone

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Posted in Obituaries

Betty James, Co-Founder of Slinky Company, is Dead

The wiry 90-year-old attempted to walk down the stairs end-over-end, but she tumbled, made a slinkity sound, and broke her neck.

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Posted in Obituaries
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