Monthly Archives: January 2012
Carnival Cruise Lines Scraps Ad Campaign Touting ‘Our Captains Don’t Abandon Ship’
NEW YORK – Carnival Cruise Lines is pulling one of its most popular television ad campaigns – the one where happy crew members raise their fists and shout, ”Our captains don’t abandon ship!” – in the wake of reports that Carnival’s Captain Francesco Schettino fled the sinking…
‘No, Herman, I’m serious–I wish you’d have brought me a pizza instead of your worthless endorsement’
Gov. Jan Brewer Meets Obama at Airport, Comes Prepared With Sign in Case She Doesn’t Recognize Him
Hillary to Step Down From ‘Grueling World Stage,’ Says She Hasn’t Gotten Over Landing in Bosnia Under Sniper Fire in 1996
Santorum Orders Wife To Be Stoned For Six-Year Relationship With Abortion Clinic Doctor
Scenes From the State of the Union Address
‘Let me get a good look at you, President Roosevelt!’
President Obama Breaks the News to Rep. Gabrielle Giffords That She Was Shot Last Year
Surprise Oscar Nominee: Director of Viral Internet Video Showing Assault of Passed-Out LSU Fan
Gingrich Emboldened by Big Win in South Carolina
“Her – the woman in the second row — that’s who I want. And I promise, sweetie, if this open marriage idea doesn’t work out, we’ll go back to normal.”
Penn State’s Board of Trustees Named ‘Persons of Interest’ in Death of Joe Paterno
STATE COLLEGE, Pa. (AP) — The 31 voting members of Penn State’s Board of Truestees are persons of interest in the death of long-time PSU football coach Joe Paterno. Shortly before Mr. Paterno’s death this morning, sources say that several, and possibly more than twenty, PSU…
Seconds Later, Gingrich Flipped Santorum Over His Shoulder
Romney had been tipped off.
Gingrich’s Ex-Wife Says He Wanted Open Marriage, Bill Clinton Endorses Gingrich for President
Newt Gingrich: ‘Nothing Instills Work Ethic in Kids Better Than A Good-Old Fashioned Fear of Cave-Ins, Suffocation in a Deep Coal Seam’
“I Asked Amy to Name the Biggest Problem the World Faces, and She Said, ‘The Jews’”
OP-ED BY FORMER PRESIDENT JIMMY CARTER – Some of my Jewish detractors recently made the astounding claim I’m anti-Semitic. I asked my friends in the Muslim Brotherhood, Hamas, and various Palestinian Islamic Jihad terror groups what they thought of that preposterous assertion, and we all…
‘Who Among Us Hasn’t Urinated on Someone At One Time Or Another?’
Op-Ed by Texas Governor Rick Perry – The video of four marines peeing on Taliban corpses should instill pride in all Americans. I, for one, am delighted to proclaim that our boys have the finest bladders in all the world, but when you got to go,…
Zombies Ate My Headlines won a Gold Medal at the 2009 Independent Publisher Awards as the Best Humor Book of the Year. And we didn't even have to bribe the selection committee.
