Monthly Archives: November 2011

Obama Beheads Turkey With Bare Hands, Forces Daughters to Watch

Posted in Extras

Fox News: College Pepper Spray Attack Gave Victims Minimum Daily Vegetable Requirements

Posted in Extras

Turkey Pardoned By Obama: “No Secret Deal”

WASHINGTON – The turkey pardoned by President Obama in the White House’s annual Thanksgiving clemency ritual thanked the President after returning to his retirement compound in San Clemente, California. The newly freed fowl denied rumors in the turkey community that he made a “secret deal”

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Posted in Extras, U.S. News

Newt Gingrich Imprints on Iowa

RIVER CITY, IOWA – Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich said he formed an everlasting bond with Iowa and made the state his “soul mate” yesterday by imprinting on it, a biological phenomenon that usually occurs spontaneously.  But Gingrich’s political foes are crying “foul,” claiming the move was politically motivated so

Posted in Extras

Paterno Vows Revenge on Rape Victim

STATE COLLEGE, PA – Fired Penn State football coach Joe Paterno said he will “get” the young man whose alleged rape in a PSU shower in 2002 led to the long-time coach’s ouster this week.  In 2002, Paterno was informed that a

Posted in Extras

Herman Cain Unveils New ‘Plan 9-9-9 From Outer Space’

Posted in Extras
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