Exercise ‘Guru’ Jack LaLanne is Dead at 96: Much Good Did Healthy Living Do Him!

pk_lalanne-dog_hoCommentary by Carbolic Smoke Ball Editor Rufus Peckham:  This past Monday, American fitness “guru” Jack LaLanne succumbed to — guess what? — pneumonia.  Dead at 96.

I hate to be the guy who says, “I told you so!” but, I told you so!  Much good did all that weight training and muscle fatigue do Jack LaLanne!

Mr. LaLanne, I am told, never snacked, and his strange daily diet consisted of hard-boiled egg whites, a cup of broth, oatmeal with soy milk, seasonal fruit, and raw vegetables.

Sorry, but that’s just sick.

Mr. LaLanne often said, “I can’t die, it would ruin my image.”  Well, guess what, Jack (or should I say, ”deceased Jack”?), the image is gone, shot to hell. You blew it, baby!  Blew it!  

All that healthy living, and look where it got you?  Dead at 96.

Utterly pathetic.

Jan 25