Democrats in Congress Call for Investigation of Cheney’s Role in Swine Flu Epidemic

cheneylookWASHINGTON – As more swine flu cases cropped up around the world overnight, Democratic leaders in Congress called for a bi-partisan commission to investigate former Vice President Cheney’s role in the epidemic. 

Senator Patrick Leahy, D-Vt., chairman of the Senate Judiciary Committee, explained: “We don’t have any evidence just yet of a connection between Cheney and the epidemic, but doesn’t this sound like the sort of thing that little weasel would be involved in?”

President Obama addressed the nation about the sudden epidemic.  “As with every other bad thing that has happened — and, look, that includes every other bad thing that will happen at any time during my administration – we inherited this problem from my predecessor.” 

Mr. Obama explained that there was only one solution to eradicating swine flu: billions of dollars of additional government spending for education and health reform.  The president noted that he previously targeted billions of dollars for education and health reform to end the recession, and that it was just “a happy coincidence” that he singled out education and health reform as key planks in his political platform during last year’s presidential campaign, long before either the recession or the swine flu epidemic. 

“Look, it’s just fortuity that the spending needed to wipe out swine flu and the recession — and really whatever else might come down the pike while I’m here – happens to match my own political agenda,” the President said.

Apr 27