Miracle at 30,000 Feet: Obama Saves 51 Souls in Plane Emergency

WASHINGTON - Barack Obama revealed today that he saved the lives of 51 passengers last month when his plane lost pitch control at a high altitude and had to make an emergency landing in St. Louis.

The pilot could not get the plane’s nose to move up and down, Obama recalled.  ”Several passengers reported the malfunction to me, and they were clearly frightened.  I chided them, ‘Oh ye of little faith!’” Obama said.  “I put down the Bible I was studying and handed my American flag lapel pin to a flight attendant for safe keeping.  Then I opened a hatch, climbed out onto the wing, and made my way to the nose. 

“It was frigid cold at that altitude, but I knew what had to be done.  When I reached the nose, I could tell intantaneously that it was stuck in one position, so with all my might I pried it loose.”  Obama then climbed back into the plane to the cheers of his fellow passengers.  “I pleaded with them not to reveal this miracle until my hour had arrived,” he said.

Aug 19

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